You know that feeling when you second guess yourself and end up making the wrong choice? It sucks, doesn’t it? What about that feeling when you’re head is saying yes, but everything inside of you is saying no, yet you accept anyway? That’s a stinker too, right? Here’s how to avoid these situations and launch yourself full throttle at your goals.
What’s your why?
This seems like such a simple question, but it holds so much power. Understanding your ‘why’ makes decision-making a walk in the park. Knowing your why makes it easier to follow your dreams. For most people this isn’t as easy as just pulling something off the top of your head. To make sure your ‘why’ resonates truly and deeply, you’ll need to spend a little time on it. Here are a few questions to help get you started:
What makes you come alive?
What are your innate strengths?
Where do you add the greatest value?
How will you measure your life?
Take your time answering these questions and be sure to keep it real, as they will form the foundation of your decision-making from here on in.
You’ve got your why, now you need your how.
With these questions answered, it’s now time to look at how these play out in day-to-day situations. Now might be a good time to come up with a set of values you’d like to act by. Stick to 5-6 values, ensuring that each one is as real and heartfelt as possible.
For example, here's a look at my values:
My friends & family always come first
I push the boundaries.
It’s somewhere in these values that you will base each and every decision you make. The more truthful and real these values are, the easier decision making becomes.
This is the hardest part, trusting that your ‘gut’ instincts are right and that you can do it. If you are clear on your values, then this will become easier and easier to do. By setting your intention through your values, and consistently checking back in with them - you will find that your default response will begin to be more consistent.
Your ‘why’ and your ‘how’ will allow you to make
a fast decision, giving you less time to overthink things!
This is also a good time to stop and forgive yourself for past mistakes or poor decisions. You will need to leave these at the metaphorical door when you come to make your next decision. Think back to a time where you made a call on something that might not have been the best choice. I’m willing to bet that at the time you made this decision, you did the best with what you had available to you at the time. Right? Then you did the best you could, right?
The beauty of forgiving yourself and laying those past demons to rest is that any decision you make from here on in will be made with facts, and only facts, not with stories that you’ve created as a result.
Saying No is the most powerful thing you can say.
Besides not having clear direction, avoiding the discomfort that comes from saying ‘NO’ also leads us to making poor decisions. The combination of always wanting to try new things, to push boundaries and not wanting to be seen as ungrateful or ‘above’ anything or anyone has turned me into the ultimate ‘yes-woman’. In the past, this has resulted in me committing to things that are not inline with my aspirations and ended up consuming valuable time that could have been much better spent.
Our inability to say no leads us to make poor decisions.
This is where our values and goals hold so much power, as they can give us the courage and the permission to say no. They are there to guide you and push you in the direction you need to go.
With these tools in your personal toolbox the need to overthink, gather ALL of the information and stew on decisions, becomes a thing of the past. We become more empowered, focussed and integral in the way we work, and in turn, our confidence in ourselves and our decision-making ability will boom.
Take the time to create your values, own them, use them, and enjoy being a brighter more empowered version of yourself.